My boyfriend got my best friend pregnant.

Dear Chaz,

I feel like I don’t have any reasons for living no more. It’s been 2 months now since my best friend Marian told me that she is pregnant. I was so happy and excited for her because being her best friend, I know that she has been wanting to have a baby for so long. At the time she told me she was pregnant, she didn’t look very happy in fact she didn’t look happy at all. I asked why and she just said that she’s just too tired but I knew that there was something wrong that she wasn’t telling me. I told my boyfriend Bill about what happened and he told me that maybe she is just really tired and I should just forget about it even gave me an assurance that he will help Marian with the rough time she was going through. Bill has been very busy at that time and has got to go a lot for what he claimed as some business trips. Weeks passed and I’ve been trying to call Marian just to make sure everything is alright but every time I call there are no answers so I went over to her place and found out that she moved somewhere else. All those time I was trying to look for her, nothing happened. I then decided to just forget about it and just hope that she’ll be alright. Three days after I decided to forget about it Marian showed up crying and talked to me. What she told me was the worst thing I’ve ever heard in my life. She told me that she got pregnant by my Bill and that she can’t lie and live like that anymore. Upon hearing those words, I felt like I was drained of all the strength and energy I can’t talk and I couldn’t even breathe. I wanted to hurt her but I couldn’t move. I wanted to shout but still there’s nothing I can do. I didn’t know what happened next. All I know is that I woke up in a hospital and a nurse handed me over a note. My so-called best friend’s note. And this is what she said “I’m really sorry for hurting you, I didn’t realize that it would go this far. I know that you hate me for what happened. I don’t blame you, I blame myself for allowing this to happen. Please forgive me. Even if you don’t treat me your best friend anymore you will always be my best friend. I’m really very sorry.” My boyfriend showed up in the hospital telling me how much he loves me. I guess he doesn’t know that I already found out about him and my Marian. When I saw him, all I could do was cry. A moment passed and I was finally able to gather a little strength. I shouted and told him to get out of my life. He asked me why? And I told him what I found out about him and my Marian. He was speechless and left the hospital. While in I was in the hospital, I kept on telling myself that I’ll get over everything and after a few days I got out and found my boyfriend waiting at my place. He was crying and begging me to forgive him and just forget everything to start a new life. Honestly I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to say yes but at the same time and I was afraid I might make a new mistake by saying yes to him. I then told him to just go and leave me alone. And that was the last time I saw him.

Now I lost my boyfriend and my bestfriend. The most important people in my life. It seems like I’m being tortured everytime I’m reminded of them. I miss the times that we were happy together and I miss boyfriend so much. I feel fooled and so stupid whenever I think of those times, those times that there was something going on between them without me knowing and being the last person to know.

I don’t know what to do now and what happened has affected everything including my job and relationship with other people. I hate seeing sweet couples and I hate seeing two friends together. I’ve been asking myself why this happened, after all the care, sacrifices and all the love I’ve given my Bill and after all the understanding I’ve given Marian. But still, I can’t find any reasons.

Just a few days ago, I heard from some friends that they are planning to get married this year and this hurts like hell.

Please help me,

Broken Trish

Dear Trish,

There’s an old saying that goes like this “Life is like a box full of chocolate, you’ll never know what you’re gonna get.” While reading your letter I found this old saying true. Sometimes you’ll get a sweet chocolate, sometimes bitter and sometimes both. Life in the same way is just like this, full of surprises, some of which are good and some of which are bad. I know that at this moment, you think that life is so unfair or life is full of pain and it makes you wonder “what have I done wrong?”

You see, life is a story which always has two sides, the good and the bad. Often times we ignore the good side and commonly notice the bad side. Ask yourself this question “Why is life unfair?” or “Is life really unfair?” Let me tell you this, life seems to be unfair if the reason why some things that happen in our life is misunderstood and by the time you understand those reason, you’ll realize that life isn’t really unfair and the thing that happened then happened for a reason. Now, you ask, “How will I understand those reasons?”… Only time will tell.

About pain, what is its purpose in our lives? Sometime we think they got no purpose and they are there just to hurt us but in reality they play a great purpose in our lives. Pain plays a special part in our lives. They are what we should consider as our best teachers. Pain teaches us to be stronger and most of all, they teach us not to make the same mistake again. Pain is so strong that we could convert them into challenges in our lives to be better.

At this moment in your life you have to be careful in every decision you make because you are in an emotional battle and you could easily make bad decisions and mistakes. Try to think more before you make any decisions. This way you will have a vision of what might happen. Turn the pain into challenges and you will definitely succeed. Forget what happened because it will only do you no good. Forgive Marian and Bill and let them live by their mistake because as long as you don’t forgive them, the more they will affect you. In times you’re alone and got nothing to do, read books, ebooks about self improvement, self help and such and you will be inspired by the great stories you will find and the best thing about it is that it will keep you away from remembering bad memories. Most of all open yourself for possibilities of finding a new partner and he just might be able to help you take the pain away.

You got a life to live for yourself and nobody else, you are precious as each of us are and you deserve a great life.

There are a lot of people out there who might have experienced the same as you did so I’ll open the comment box here so they could impart the ways they did to deal with that situation.

I wish you a great life.

All the best,

Chaz